Old Photographs with Old Orbs

Although I have always loved a good ghost story, for many years of my life, I wrote off all paranormal experiences as part of my overactive imagination.  I was a rationalist.  In many ways,  I still am.  I always look for natural explanations for everything before  I look to supernatural.  It is only when there is no other explanation that I will look to other answers.   When I lived in Murfreesboro, Tennessee, I was plagued by a series of bizarre occurrences that I explained away with whatever natural explanations I could.  I still explain them away.  I honestly can't believe that house was haunted.

For example, one night I was watching television and the garage door just started opening and closing over and over again.  I couldn't get it to stop.  I mashed the button and yelled at it but it kept going.  I figured the damned thing was broken.  It finally stopped and worked fine after that, but mechanical malfunctions happen, right?   Another night all the electronic toys in the living room started going off at the same time.  Remote control cars buzzed around the room and toy Buzz Lightyear's screamed out about infinity and beyond.  A cow flashlight bellowed "moo"  over and over again.  I laughed.  It was funny.  I don't remember how I explained that one, but it made a lot of sense.  Similar things happened often in that house, but it was a new house and I didn't think it was haunted.  One night I did panic.  The garage door opened and I couldn't get it to close.  Every time I closed it, it just opened again.   It really freaked me out, but what are you going to do?  In the morning it was OK.   We moved,  I forgot about all these oddities and I had wonderful explanations for all of these types of events even if I can't remember them now.

However,  as I went through some old photo albums,  I found a series of wonderful photographs in that house with some lovely orbs.   Orbs in no way prove the presence of the supernatural, but I find their presence interesting and they make me wonder if maybe all my explanations weren't wrong?  Who knows?  They are lovely orbs.  I'm not going to put them all here because I was much better back then and I have them glued in scrapbooks I hate to destroy, but I placed one on the top of this page.  All the photos look similar. Some of the orbs almost have little faces in them. 

Adderall is NOT for all

A few months ago, I became highly incensed at someone over at the Bitter Lawyer's blog when she referenced the casual and illegal use of Adderall, then discussed how she was in constant search of a prescription (you can find that blog here). My response went something like this (okay, exactly like this):

This makes me sick. I’m mostly very easygoing about most subjects, but it pisses me off when people abuse prescription drugs to gain an advantage over other people. People that actually need Adderall face a negative stigma because of people like you–those that abuse it just to churn out the work.

If you need Adderall, that is one thing. But to shamelessly act as if you are entitled to it because you want to get ahead? It, quite frankly, pisses me off. 

Now allow me to explain why I get so angry about this particular subject. Two years ago, I began law school. I have always been highly hyperactive, although for the most part, I used my excess energy to achieve other things. Many assumed I was medicated, and many others recommended that I medicate (to which I always politely asked where they received their medical degrees and why they were working in such a low-paying field since they were a DOCTOR). But I digress...


As I said, I began law school two years ago. I loved it. I still do. Loved everything about it...including the people....all of them....for approximately 2.5 months.

Then it went downhill really, really, REALLY quickly.

You see, most people don't understand that ADHD comes in three different types: inattentive, hyperactive-impulsive, and combined. For the most part, when people think of ADHD, they think of children bouncing all over the damn walls asking too many questions and never paying attention. That's combined ADHD, and the most common type, which is why most people think of it when ADHD comes to mind.

I am hyperactive-impulsive ADHD. I'm no longer ashamed of it. For a very long time, I assumed my symptoms were merely due to a Type A personality. It wasn't until I went to law school and began to run into the severe social stigma associated with these symptoms that I began realizing it could potentially be a problem. Hence the downhillishness (which was straight up Elle Woods style--aka: take your damn muffins and go away; we don't want you in our study group). In fact, most people do not realize that many people diagnosed with ADHD do not medicate to focus better, but to become more acceptable and in-line with societal expectations.

I finally broke when I had a group of "mean girl" law students (and I'm talking women in their 20's and 30's) send a "representative" mean girl over to one of my few friends to tell her if my "behavior" continued, then they would be contacting the teacher of a particular class to essentially tattle on me.

This came shortly after the beginning of my second semester in law school. Grades had been announced, and (SURPRISE) I had not done nearly as well as I would have liked. I had approximately two friends in law school, and had been abandoned by all of my initial group of friends when the hustle began for first semester final exam studying.

Mind you, my behavior was not over the top. However, hyperactivity and impulsiveness is not easily managed, and pisses a few people off. Although I would argue others should really (REALLY) become more tolerable to the differences in others and should strive to accept others, the harsh reality was that my symptoms, although acceptable to almost everyone around me, had a couple of others willing to come forward and essentially try to ruin my life.

I went to the psychology center on campus and started testing for my problems with Tom, an incredible grad student who didn't just test, but also dug in depth to my past and current problems. (A lot of people are also misdiagnosed with ADHD when they really have depression, FYI.) I explained to him how unfair I thought it was that I was the one who should be considering medicine, when others should have just considered tolerance, and that's when his counseling came in. If anyone has seen the Glee episode where Emma speaks to a Psychiatrist/Psychologist (fittingly, from the episode named "Acceptance"), his speech was VERY similar to that. However, he was a bit more understanding as well, because he said IT WASN'T FAIR. It shouldn't be me who has to change. He explained to me in many ways, my brain had already rewired to get along more easily in society. He was the one who explained to me how many people who are ADHD medicate in order to meet societal expectations (for those of you that think it's about studying or paying attention in class...it's a LOT more than that). And it's because of him I was officially diagnosed ADHD....

Hyperactive-impulsive ADHD, to be exact. That means that I have trouble controlling my impulses (like speaking out in class or eating six cupcakes when I'm not hungry). It means that I go at a faster speed than a lot of people. And yes, sometimes I do have trouble concentrating, because I have impulses to do OTHER THINGS. Or because I get so caught up on one little detail, that I miss the big picture (which is hell on a law school exam).

Because of my diagnosis, I was now able to speak to a psychiatrist about medicine. I did go to one on campus, and he was also incredible. We spoke at length about how I didn't want to medicate and become another person. I told him I didn't want medicine just to be able to do better in school. And I also expressed (again) my frustration regarding others' reactions around me.

I'm now on a low-dosage of Adderall. In some ways, it has helped immensely. I can sit down and listen to a teacher without feeling the need to ask questions. I don't get hung up on the small details nearly as much anymore. And I still feel like myself.

But let me tell you, it should never have come down to others FORCING me to take action because of my symptoms. I should never have been made to feel like a terrible person because of things I couldn't help. And even though the medicine does help, it still incenses me that I broke down in tears many times because of a bunch of mean girls threatening me about something over which I had no control.

I didn't intend for this blog to become my own personal story about my battles with Attention Hyperactivity Deficit Disorder, but now that it's out, I feel a lot better. If you are having problems, I urge you to seek counseling. Medicine is not everything, and does not heal all, but talking to someone definitely does.

And it's nothing to feel ashamed about.

I have dubious tastes....but IT'S OKAY

I normally don't do linkups, because I'm not a huge part of the blogging community, being that I'm new and all. However, today, I found one to be worthwhile thanks to Ty and Neely. So without further ado, here it is....

IT'S OKAY.....

to want to dropkick people that have pictures of themselves "planking" (when they really are just laying there like a friggin' piece of wood).

to expect children to say thank you, please, ma'am and sir, and excuse me.

to occasionally eat chocolate for breakfast....

that you were 23 before you properly learned to spell the word "judgment".... (and it took law school to do it).

when it storms....and you just washed your car....by hand....

to wish really bad Karma on really bad people under your breath.

to delete people from Facebook on the basis that they don't know the difference between your/you're; two/to/too; and their/there/they're...

to have 19 little black dresses hanging in your closet...

to laugh at your own jokes.

to spend all day watching Law and Order, SVU marathons....(have I mentioned they are ALL on Netflix?!!??!?!)

to not bathe because you're watching a marathon of Law and Order, SVU marathons and you can't shower fast enough to do it in a commercial break....

to secretly like the song "Chicken Fried."

to want to grow up to be a movie star AND a lawyer.

Fringeology

Fringelology is an exploration of the paranormal by award winning journalist Steve Volt.  Steve Volt explores the world of the paranormal with a cautious eye in this fun book.  The book covered a lot of ground and explored a wide range of the paranormal.  Volt started with a unique hypothesis.   He set out with the argument that the study of the paranormal is polarized and biased to the point that it is almost never regarded in any kind of  real fashion.  He argues that there tend to be three groups and that all three groups are so passionate and furiously biased that they can't even really look at the subject of the paranormal in an unbiased light.  He lists these groups as skeptics, religious folks, and paranormal true believers.  He says the skeptics tend to lump religious and paranormal together and will defend the most unlikely natural explanation  before even thinking about a paranormal explanation.  The religious people tend to view the paranormal as the dark arts and the true believers in the paranormal will fight to believe any paranormal event no matter how unlikely it is to have occurred.   He is most passionate about skeptics who he believes are irrational in their closed mindedness.  He neither endorses nor argues against the paranormal but rather says that we should study it with he same objective, open mindedness we do any other occurrence rather than say faulty plumbing is the explanation for every phantom noise when it couldn't possibly be faulty plumbing.

Volt then presents a number of interesting chapters which cover various aspects of the paranormal.  The chapter called Death and Not Dying was the most interesting to me as it covered Elisabeth Kulber-Ross's interesting journey from being the authority on death and coping with death and grieving into a world of near death experiences and the paranormal.  Her journey is riveting.  Other chapters discuss UFOs, lucid dreams, ghosts, telepathy, and communicating with the dead.   Volt's usual way of exploring these topics is to pick a respectable scientist who has studied or been involved in the study of said subject and explore their findings, life, and opinions.

Overall,  I love this book.  It is well written and covers a lot of ground that has never been covered.  I couldn't put the book down.  I like Volt's argument that the paranormal should be study objectively and I believe he does an excellent job supporting this.   Volt is a good writer and his style made this book a quick and easy read.  However,  I am nit picky and Volt spent a good deal of time with psychologists and psychiatrists.   It did bother the hell out of me that he couldn't seem to keep the two straight.  Kubler-Ross is  a  psychiatrist.  She went to medical school.  Psychologists don't go to medical school.  We aren't MDs.  Throughout the book he called her a psychologist so often I didn't know in later chapters when he talked about psychologists if he was really talking about psychologists or psychiatrists.  This is important because psychiatrists study the medication end of the field, while psychologists are more mired in research and talk therapy.    He also presented new theoretical ideas that groups of psychiatrists or psychologists (I can't tell) dreamt up and presented them as actual diagnoses followed by statements that diagnoses aren't  real.   Just for the record,  according to the international medical community diagnoses are real and help to treat people who are sick.  For example, diagnosing someone with schizophrenia helps find the proper treatment for them.  In order to be a real diagnosis to be considered real,  it must come out of the DSM or ICD (the most current revision) and have a code and have been agreed on by an enormous panel of professionals.  I can't just dream up farting monster syndrome write a paper about it and call it a diagnosis.  It would take years of study and tons of support and research by more people than me to make my farting monster syndrome a working diagnosis that I could bill for.  Volt was similarly weak in his explanation of  the placebo effect, which he described as close to paranormal.  I won't explain why, because that would probably annoy everyone but me,  but there are oceans of data explaining why the placebo effect occurs and none of it is paranormal.  Volt also ignored theories on poltergeists that attribute them to one person when he described his house as being haunted by a poltergeist.   I could go on like this with other nit picky points of science and medicine and the paranormal for pages, but I'll stop here and say that had Volt been a little more careful in these types of details I would say his book is up there with Spook as one of my favorite paranormal books.  Volt managed to collect some really fascinating paranormal stories and tie them together with a brilliant writing style.  For me the devil may be in the details, but perhaps I am being too harsh.  To the normal reader who isn't a psychologist  these details would be lost.  The flow of the narrative and the structure of the book would be more pronounced and Volt certainly tells many good stories of those fighting for a scientific regard for paranormal subjects in a world than generally gives them as much regard as unicorns and fairy god mothers.

Variation Use Local Business

From: Robert Larsen
Subject: RE: Collection Issue....Please Reply‏

Thanks getting back to me. I represent Larsen Fabrics Limited and we are based in United Kingdom. We request your representation to counsel us in litigation and enable us collect a debt owed to us in the amount $900,000.00USD by a delinquent seller in your jurisdiction.

Screenmakers Northwest
3925 Martin Luther King Jr Way
Seattle, WA 98108-1545

We are of the opinion that once our presence is established in your state via a legal representative, our seller will have no option but comply with payment request and accompanied with legal action and litigation will push for the accounts to be paid to effectively.

We happened to have place an order of Machinery Equipment worth $1,800,000.00, and they demanded we pay 50 percent of the funds before delivering our products. Payment to the seller was made in August of 2010 and our calculation shows that delivery is above three Months late, for the regular purchase agreement requires seller to effect goods not later than 60 days upon payment or legal action may be enforced if delivery delay exceeds 90 days.

It will be very helpful if we receive your retainer agreement for review. This will enable our board decide on the conditions of the retainer in our next board meeting. Also once we have reviewed your agreement I will forward you supporting documents i.e., proof of payment, sales invoice, wire transfer slip. This will enable your firm start working on this case. I will also call you to follow up on this matter once your firm has agreed to take on this case.

We thank you for your business as we look forward to your prompt response.

Sincerely,
Robert Larsen.
President
Larsen Fabrics Ltd
19-23 Grosvenor HilL,
London, UK W1K3QD.
www.larsenfabrics.com
Tel:+447035968345
Fax:+448447747789

MPRE....in the words of the ever relevant Mortal Kombat, FINISH HER!!!!!!!!

So I'm taking the MPRE this Friday, and haven't done very much in way of studying aside from taking a class in Professional Responsibility. Which I didn't do nearly as well on as I would have hoped. Which is the test I cried over after I finished (you can read about that here). So I may just have a mental block against it. Or maybe I'm just not ethical. Or maybe I think ethicality (call me Palin, cause I just made up a word) can be summed up in one sentence: if you have to question whether it's ethical or not, it isn't. And if you're just not a very ethical person and don't pause to consider the ramifications of you actions, KARMA will get around to you.

Isn't that so much easier than requiring me to sacrifice a few hours of a perfectly good Friday to take this test? And sacrifice even more days hours trying to cram a bunch of wacky rules into my already packed brain?

Not to mention weathering the ramifications of potential flashbacks due to my overwhelmingly negative experiences with this subject?

I should sue for intentional infliction of emotional distress.

Success, Sales, Sorry and Solder

A bit of a mixed bag today:

I was fortunate enough to win Helen Yendall's mini-saga competition and you can read my entry and the runner-up on her blog here.

I've learnt that 100 Stories For Queensland has gone on sale in bookshops in Australia. It probably won't happen in the UK but it still gave me a buzz to see a picture of a book featuring one of my stories sitting next to the latest James Bond.

Next – an apology. For quite a while now Blogger has stopped displaying my Followers. I can't see anyone else's Followers either. The space is there but no icons with your lovely smiling faces. I know there are some new visitors who have left comments so if some of you have become Followers and are a bit miffed that I have not returned the compliment then rest assured that I have created a folder in the Favourites section on my browser for your links.

Carol of Carol's Corner has been giving me some tips, when we meet at NWC, on how to get my Followers back but so far nothing has worked. I've been on the Real Blogger Status site but that seems to assume I know all about domains and layered security (what?). It's not my computer because I get the same problem on my wife's laptop and the machines down the library. So if anyone out there has any ideas then all contributions are welcome. Being an engineer I'm a bit ashamed at my inability to sort out a technical problem. My excuse is that my degree in electronics was taken before all this computer black magic came along and when we were barely out of the valve era. Any faults could usually be fixed by a dab of solder. In fact, when my dad taught me how to solder, the soldering iron wasn't even electric. You had to place the tip in an open flame in order to heat it up. How I long for those simple days...