Wong Award

Today, the award for concise spam goes to...(drum roll)...Danny Wong. Thank you Danny for being to the point and sincere. Although, I am hurt. It looks like you have been seeing other lawyers. We should talk about where this relationship is going.

From: jobs@tcapte.com
Subject: Attention Counsel
Date: July 30, 2009 10:27:50 AM PDT
To: undisclosed-recipients:;
Reply-To: info@tcapte.com


Attention Counsel:

My Name is Daniel Wong President of Trailblazer Communications Asia Pte Ltd. We need
legal service in Collection/litigation.

Please let us know if you can be of help.

Daniel Wong

Trailblazer Communications Asia Pte Ltd
Address: 33 LIANG SEAH STREET #03-01
SINGAPORE SINGAPORE
Tel:+65 6227 6367
Fax:+65 6227 6373
E-Mail: info@tcapte.com

Plastic Lawyer

wangliu11@9.cn

HANG LUNG PLASTIC FACTORY (SHENZHEN) LTD.
163 DONG SHEN ROAD, E GONG LIN,
PING HU ZHEN, LONG GONG QU, SHENZHEN, CHINA
TEL : (86) 755 28213229
FAX : (86) 755 28213436
www.hanglungonline.com

Attention Counsel

Request for Legal assistance.

This is an official request for legal representation on behalf of Hang
Lung Plastic Factory Limited. Our Company’s principal activity is to
produce and Supply plastics use in the construction of building,
production of plastic household materials and polyethylene bags. Our
product are of standard and it being use globally.

We are presently incapacitated due to international legal boundaries to
exert pressure on our delinquent customers and we request for your
services accordingly. We got your contact information from the Online
Lawyers Directory as a result of our search for a reliable firm or
individual to provide legal services as requested.

After a careful review of your profile as well as your qualification and
experience, we are of the opinion that you are capable and qualified to
provide the legal services as requested.

On behalf of Hang Lung Plastic Factory Limited. Please accept my sincerest
appreciation in advance for your willingness to render your services as we
look forward to your prompt response to our request.

Yours truly,

Wang Liu

Chairman & CEO

Romeo's Lawyer

O Romeo, Romeo, wherefore art thou e-mail spam?
Deny thy father and refuse thy spam filter;
Or if thou wilt not, be but sworn by my inbox
And I'll no longer be a Capulet.


Romeo Orms: ormskerk7@aol.co.benwebservices.com

Attention

Please note that I am making this business introduction based on my regard for your credibility and your company profile I went through online. Due to your long experience in business, I would want to go into partnership with you. Am the Director of Europe Operations for the NPA-STP (National Petroleum Agency of Sao tome & Princippe). To be precise, I oversee Europe operations for the agency.

My position in the agency entitles me to recommend oil allocation and actualise oil lifting and exploration allocation licences to candidates based on my interest.In 2003,I facilitated and actualised the license of Business man from Iraq.The license was for 5years at 24 MILLION BBLS/12 MONTHS.Due to reasons unknown to me,i havent heard from the man since 2005.I just recently heard from a reliable source that the man is late.He died due to the recent attacks in Iraq.

The license is valid till date as i always ensure that i keep to my side of the bargain.I have decided to begin using the license from this month.

I seek your involvement as a partner due to your experience in business.I will package you as the allocation license beneficiary.Due to my position in the agency(NPA-STP),i cannot handle this project,thats why i need your assistance.With current events in Sao Tome&Principe,we shall be able to lift a mininmum of 1.5million Barrels per month.

This is what i propose:
1.You provide me with your company name which shall be used in place of the initial license operator.
2.I will ensure that your company name is recognised as the license operator and that we have a lay can date for atleast 1 Million barrels per month.
3.I will ensure that all lifting procedures are in place and buyers readily available.
4.You stand in as the license operator for all lifting and sales transactions,we shall open an account for the receipt of the oil sales proceeds in which both of us shall be signatories to the account.
5.We shall split the oil sales proceeds in the ratio of 50:50 equity share.
Equity will be at the end of every annual quarter.

I believe you are a man of wisdom and integrity.This offer i make is based on utmost good faith.I would be jeopardising my position in the agency,if word of this goes out.Therefore without mincing words,i rely on you for utmost confidentiality on every bit of details relating to this transaction.

Upon your positive response,i will be willing to forward to you,proof of my proposition.I look forward to a prospective business relationship between us.

Remain Blessed as i expect your reply.meoormskerk@aol.com

meo ormskerk.
Director Europe Operations.
NPA-STP.

Toho Lawyer

Attention; Counselor ,

We, the management of Toho Tecknology (H.K.)Co Ltd., require your legal representation for our North American Customers. We are of the opinion that the ability to consolidate payments from North America will eradicate delays due to inter-continental monetary transaction between Asia and North America .

We understand that a proper Attorney Client Retainer will provide the necessary authorization and we are most inclined to commence talks as soon as possible.Your consideration of our request is highly anticipated and we look forward to your prompt response / request.

Sincerely,
Mrs. Monikan Wang.

Iron Man Lawyer

Dear Counsel,

This is an official request for legal representation on behalf of
Hangzhou Iron & Steel Group Company. We are iron and steel company
with principal business in steel manufacturing and trading.

We are presently incapacitated due to international legal boundaries
to exert pressure on our delinquent customers and we request for your
services accordingly. We got your contact information from the Online
Lawyers Directory as a result of our search for a reliable firm or
individual to provide legal services as requested.

After a careful review of your profile as well as your qualification
and experience, we are of the opinion that you are capable and
qualified to provide the legal services as requested.
On behalf of Hangzhou Iron & Steel Group Company, Please accept my
sincerest appreciation in advance for your willingness to render your
services as we look forward to your prompt response to our request.

Thank you.
Mr. Ken Dominic.
Branch manager,
Hangzhou Iron & Steel Group Company
England office.

You Can Eradicate Delays?

Mr. Blaire, thanks for the email. I don't have a lot of time to be sarcastic with you. I have all this real stuff I need to do. I will say this (and I seem to have to say it often), you already emailed me. Or one of your friends did. With this same content. You need to step it up. The whole purpose of this blog is to provide a place for your name and content to pop up when someone google's your info. But you are giving out redundant content. Bad form. You will never catch a big phish this way.

michaelblair@royalegenerators.com
This inquiry is the result of a search of the Lawyer Locator on
martindale.com.
Sent By:Royale Generators
Name: Michael Blair
Company Name: Royal Power Ltd
City: State/Country: Unite Kingdom
Email Address: michaelblair@royalegenerators.com
Phone: 0044 844 202 082
Fax 44-7006-009-899
Comments:
Royal Power Ltd (UK) West bromwich B71 1DG, Great Britain
We the management of Royal Power Ltd, United Kingdom require your legal
representation for our North American Customers. We are of the opinion that
the ability to consolidate payments from North America will eradicate delays
due to inter-continental monetary transaction between UK and North America .
We understand that a proper Attorney Client Retainer will provide the
necessary authorization and we are most inclined to commence talks as soon as
possible. Your consideration of our request is highly anticipated and we look
forward to your prompt response request.
Sincerely,
Michael Blair

NOTE: Due to the inherent anonymity of the internet, the identity of
allindividuals should be confirmed prior to entering into any
business arrangement.

Well, top of the day to you. And the rest of the day to 'ya, laddie. Looking forward to being your number one guy. Feel free to email anytime with your unsolicited phishing scams. They make me feel important and smart. Somewhere. Somehow. I am going to get all these customers that are ripping off you poor, honest and sincere textile/fabric companies.


Top of the day to you Attorney,Our company has decided to contact your Law
firm as regards Litigation and collection issue with some of our indebted
customers within your region.In order to achieve these objectives a good
and reputable Attorney/Law firm will be required to handle this service.
do confirm the receipt of this mail due to the urgency of this matter.If
you are in the position to represent us at the moment kindly advice immediately.


Sincerely,
Mr.Chen Yu
General Manager
Voith Fabrics Stubbins Limited

If you get these emails often, you have to give credit to those who take the time to make them look legit. Like Mr. Mengfei. He gives us the classic three paragraph style letter (who we are? what we do/why we need you? What you get? But he cleans up all the bad spelling and punctuation, adds some numbers and other legitimizing facts about his organization and really sells it. So proud of you Mr. Mengfei. As you continue to find ways to lie, cheat and steal from naive lawyers, I encourage you to take some chances and provide us something a bit more entertaining.

Dear Sir/Madam,

The China National Offshore Oil Corporation (CNOOC), founded in 1982, is one of the largest state-owned oil giants in China, as well as the largest offshore oil and gas producer.It is authorized to cooperate with foreign partners for oil and gas exploitation in China’s offshore areas. Headquartered in Beijing, it has a total staff of 5,000 with a registered capital of RMB 94.9 billion.

Due to some accounts in USA, Canada and North/South America not fulfilling their contractual obligations, we are currently looking to appoint a legal representative in your Country to ensure that our delinquent or past due accounts are settled and represent our company in the collection or possible law suit. We are incapacitated by distance logistics to directly collect payments that are due or to commence litigations directly in such cases, but our company cannot continue to absorb the continued losses from unpaid accounts. Below are the services we hope your organization can help us with.

1.Received payments that are due from our customers.(2.) Received the said funds of past due accounts and keep in a trust account on our behalf until requested by our company.(3.) Payments receive from USA, Canada and North/South America are used for the purchase of raw material, you will be instructed on how and when to disburse to our suppliers and supply us with monthly details of how much that was collected and subsequently disbursed.(4). In the event of any customer not wanting to pay their debt, help us in possible law suit.

Should your organization be able to provide these services to us, please contact me for more information by this email: mrwumengfei0ffice@msn.com

Mr.Wu Mengfei (Chief Financial Officer)
Human Resources Service Co.
CNOOC Oil Base Group Ltd.
Address:6 Dongzhimenwai Xiaojie,
Dongcheng District, Beijing, China 100027
Telephone:010-845210, 010-845319
Fax:010-646025
Website:www.cnooc.com.cn

Because Your Website Needs Help

Mark Bennett is a Houston criminal defense lawyer and top notch blogger, if you follow criminal defense (I do). For this weekends offering we turn to Mr. Bennett's blog and widen the scope for lawyer scams with this boiler room hustle. So if you need a lying ass hat to lie to your clients, get in touch with Web Guardian today!

So Many Delinquent Accounts, So Little Time

chanli53@yahoo.com.hk

Dear Attorney:
The management of Motor Electric Manufacturing Company Ltd.requires your legal representation for our North American delinquent Customers. We are of the opinion that a reputable attorney is required to represent us in North America in order for us to recover monies due to our organization by overseas customers, and as well follow up with these accounts. In order to achieve these objectives a good and reputable law firm like yours will be required to handle this service.
We understand that a proper Attorney Client agreement must be entered into by both parties.
This will be done immediately we receive your letter of acceptance.
Attorney,
Your questions regarding this Proposal is welcome. Once more thank you for taking time from your busy Schedule to read this mail.

Liu Chan
President
Motor Electric Manufacturing Company Ltd.
Phone/Fax:852 2480 5592
chanli53@yahoo..com.hk

Spam I Am

This one should have probably just gone straight to delete. It is not directed at a lawyer. I mean, nobody really buys into these ones anymore. Do they? Come on! Western Union, South Africa and a promise of easy money?


Good day,

I represent NEXON IMPORT AND EXPORT COMPANY PLC based in the South Africa. My company markets and exports polymeric Polyol and other products for world trade. We are searching for representatives who can help us establish a medium of getting to our customers in Europe, Canada, America, Asia, Cayman Island and Australia/New Zealand as well as making payments through you as our payment officer. It is upon this note that we seek your assistance to stand as our representative in your country. Please note, as our representative, you will receive 10% of whatever amount you clear for the company and the balance will be paid to us via western union, money gram or into an account we will avail to you.

Please, to facilitate the conclusion of this transaction if accepted, please forward to us the following Requirements for your application:

(1) FULL NAME
(2) FULL POSTAL ADDRESS
(3) TELEPHONE NUMBER
(4) CELL NUMBER
(5) GENDER
(6) OCCUPATION

Yours Faithfully,
Mr. Terry Watson.
Telephone Number: +27 786 29 1279
Email Address: terrywatsonsa@webmail.co.za

No New Tale to Tell

You sir, bore me.


swtex2@gmail.com

Attention: Counsel

This is an official requisition for your legal consultation services on
behalf of San Wu Textile Company Ltd.

blah, blah blah.

Thank you.
Kun-Nung Chen
General Manager,
San Wu Textile Company Ltd.

Kwok, you accidently sent this to me four times. Strange that you put all your info in a Word document. All of it just seems...well, spammy. You don't want to be thought of as spammy? Do you? Kwok?

Attention Attorney,

Download letter attached below for detials.

Kwok Clement
Managing Director
Chun WO Development Holding Ltd.
Email: kwockclement@live.com
Tel (852)2745-8389
Fax (852)2744-6937

Chun Wo Development Holding Ltd
C2 Hong Kong Spinners Industrial Building 
601-603 Tai Nan West Street 
Cheung Sha Wan, Kowloon 
Hong Kong
Private Email: clementkwok@live.com
www.chunwo.com
Tel: (852) 2745-8389
Fax:  (852) 2744-6937 
 
Request for legal services,
 
I would highly appreciate if you could respond to this email due to the urgency of this matter, if you are not in position to represent us at the moment kindly advice immediately.
 
After a careful review, we decided to contact you to represent our company in North America. Chun Wo holdings Ltd with its head office in Hong Kong, We got your contact detail from our online search for attorney. The management of Chun Wo holdings ltd, requires your legal representation for our North American delinquent Customers.
 
We are of the opinion that a reputable attorney is required to represent us in North America in order for us to recover monies due to our organization by overseas customers, and as well follow up with these accounts. In order to achieve these objectives a good and reputable law firm like yours will be required to handle this service. We understand that both parties must enter into a proper Attorney Client agreement.
 
This will be done immediately we receive your letter of acceptance. Attorney, you can advise us what is required to draw a proper letter of engagement that will be review by our board. We are most inclined to commence talks with you as soon as possible. We shall bring you into a detailed picture of what your responsibility is, when we receive your response.
 
Your consideration of our request is highly anticipated, and we look forward to your prompt response to this request. Your questions regarding this Proposal are welcome.
 
Once more, thanks for taking time from your busy Schedule to read this email. 
 
Yours sincerely, 
 
Kwok Clement
Managing Director
Chun Wo Development Holding Ltd.
Private Email: clementkwok@live.com

Slow Weekend

Only law-spam was this barebones email. No effort. Come on guys!


Attention Counsellor:Part-time Job Offer at 8%,if interested contact us by
sending your: Full Name:, Address:, Occupation:,Job Experience:,
Phone Number:, Contact:

Name : Mr. Joe van Hae
Email:hae.rohm@gmail.com
Manager.

Dear Chang,
You wouldn't happen to be the same Chang Ming Cheng of little league baseball fame? I am gonna call you tonight! You are a star! What are you doing slumming around with these spammers? And when did you move to London?


Attention: Counsel,


We the management of Jinan Haohua Industry, Co. Ltd, require your legal representation for our North American Customers. Jinan Haohua Industry, Co. Ltd,

blah blah blah (same old stuff here)


Sincerely,


Chang Ming Cheng,
Managing Director.



--
JINAN HAOHUO INDUSTRY, CO. LTD
15 OLD SQUARE
LINCOLN'S INN
LONDON WC2A 3UE
LONDON, ENGLAND
Tel:+44 702 409 4578

State of USA Lawyer

I did not even know I was listed in the "state of USA lawyers Directory." I look forward to other promising referrals from this reputable directory. Thanks for thinking of me as someone you could cheat and defraud for thousands of dollars, but I represent so many embryo cloth companies that my plate is full. Good luck in your efforts.


This is an official requisition for your legal consultation services on behalf of Tenluxe Co.Ltd.

We are based in Taiwan and our principal activity is manufacturing cotton yarn,mixed spinning yarn, chemical fiber yarn, embryo cloth, RTW clothes and knitwear.Other activities include constructing, leasing and selling residential and commercial buildings and provision of investment services We are presently incapacitated due to international legal boundaries to exert pressure on our delinquent customers in USA and we request for your services accordingly.

We got your contact information from the state of USA lawyers Directory as a result of our search for a reliable firm or individual to provide legal services as requested. After a careful review of your profile as well as your qualification and experience, we are of the opinion that your are capable and qualified to provide the legal services as requested.

Please accept my sincerest appreciation on behalf of Tenluxe Co., Ltd.,in advance for your willingness to render your services as we look forward to your prompt response to our request.Thank you.


Managing Director
Company Name:Tenluxe Co., Ltd.
Taipei County,22041,Taiwan.

Ken's Lawyer

NETZDAQ SDN BHD
ADDRESS: NO. 19G, GROUND FLOOR TAMAN SUBANG
PERDANA, SHAH ALAM SELANGOR, 40150,
MALAYSIA.
TELEPHONE: 60143343371
FAX:60-3-2178-4383

Attention Counsel,
Netzdaq Sdn Bhd is a manufacturing company with its head office in Selangor, Malaysia, with branches all over Asian continent. The management of Netzdaq Sdn Bhd. requires your legal representation for our American delinquent customers.

We are looking for a reputable attorney to represent us in America in order for us to recover monies due to our organization by overseas customers, and as well follow up with these accounts. In order to achieve these objectives a good and reputable law firm will be required to handle this service.

We understand that a proper Attorney client agreement must be entered into by both parties. Your consideration of our request is highly anticipated, and we look forward to your prompt response.

Yours Faithfully,

Ken Sato
Manager.

Boring Me

Hon-hing, you get zero points for content. This is garbage. Why can't you be more like Abe (see below). I will acknowledge that the bold blue font was aesthetically pleasing and made me want to trust you. However, you already contacted me. Twice. With different emails. Come on. Bring your A-game. I am waiting.


From: Mr. Hon-hing Wong.
Legal Representative/Owner,
Quanzhou Haitian Textile Co.,Ltd,
Address: Haitian Industrial Park ,
Jiangnan Development Zone,
Quanzhou , Fujian, China
Email: honhing_wong88@msn.com
Website: http://www..htt.cn


Dear Counsel,

Request for Legal assistance


This is an official request for legal representation on behalf of Quanzhou Haitian Textile Co.Ltd. We are a textile company with principal business in garment manufacturing and trading.

We are presently incapacitated due to international legal boundaries to exert pressure on our delinquent customers and we request for your services accordingly. We got your contact information from the Online Lawyers Directory as a result of our search for a reliable firm or individual to provide legal services as requested.

After a careful review of your profile as well as your qualification and experience, we are of the opinion that you are capable and qualified to provide the legal services as requested.

On behalf of Quanzhou Haitian Textile Co.Ltd, Please accept my sincerest appreciation in advance for your willingness to render your services as we look forward to your prompt response to our request.

Thank you.

Mr. Hon-hing Wong.
Legal Representative/Owner,
Quanzhou Haitian Textile Co.Ltd.
Website: http://www.htt.cn

Along Came Abe

Abe,thank you so much. After reading 6 re-hashed emails of the same content with different company names, I was starting to think this was some kind of scam. Just a touch of originality. Something new for my eyes to float over. But then came Abe. Thanks for dolling things up a bit.

Here is the bad news. My email is broken. Can you call me?

Dear Attorney

We wish to retain your services to facilitate in the retrieval of delinquent accounts and holdings from our customers in the United States. These accounts have been delinquent for a while, due to the current economic crisis in the United States, and we have been lenient enough to give a credit period of 3 months, which started in the month of October in the year, 2008, before requesting payments. We would like for the accounts to be mediated and closed before the end of the incoming quarter. We believe that all owed funds to our company will be made payable contingent upon acquiring the assistance of your office.

Also, the companies that have disarray with have been legitimate to our company for years so we believe and hope that the need for litigation will not arise.

We would like to receive your retainer agreement, rates and all other essential material regarding your firm's compensation policies. These, and all other material, can be communicated via the company's presidents email address,abe_sakai@jetemail.net.

We look forward to your reply

Sincerely,
Abe Sakai

Re Hash

Mutual Introduction-Possible Representation

Dear Counsel,

I have previously sent you an email; please confirm the receipt of this mail
due to the urgency of this matter. If you are not in position to represent
us at the moment kindly advice immediately. After a careful review, we
decided to contact you to represent our company in North America. Matila
Manufacturing Pte Ltd is a manufacturing company in Asia We would require
your legal representation for our North American delinquent Customers.

We are of the opinion that a reputable attorney is required to represent us
in North America in order for us to recover monies due to our organization
by oversea customers, and as well follow up with these accounts. In order to
achieve these objectives a good and reputable law firm like yours will be
required to handle this service. We understand that a proper Attorney Client
agreement must be entered into by both parties. This will be done
immediately we receive your letter of acceptance.
Awaiting your swift Response.

Sincerely,
Patrick William
Robert Weng.

Jinan Lawyer

Oh Chang. You little scamp. I wouldn't work for you. I have to much to do today. But a tip of the hat to you. Using a real company that has an actual website. I am so proud of you. Today, you are a man. A proper Phisher Man.


Jinan Haohua Industry, Co. Ltd
292-45 shindand
Seoul Teugbyeolsi , Korea
Email: chming_ind@live.com

Attention: Counsel,

We the management of Jinan Haohua Industry, Co. Ltd, require your legal representation for our American Customers. Jinan Haohua Industry, Co. Ltd, a manufacturer and supplier of chemical, we are been owed payment on a shipment that we made to a customer in America in June 2008 and now seeking advice and possible representation in litigation against the non-paying company.

We are of the opinion that the ability to consolidate payments from America will eradicate delays due to inter-continental monetary transaction between the ASIA and America. We understand that a proper Attorney Client Retainer will provide the necessary authorization and we are most inclined to commence talks as soon as possible.

Your consideration of our request is highly anticipated and we look forward to your prompt response.

Sincerely,


Chang Ming Cheng,

Managing Director.

chming_ind@live.com

I usually don't include the subject line in these emails. But this one was precious: "Please Work With Us (Good Offer)"


Name: Lee Chang
Company Name: City: hongkong State/Country: China heshibang
Email Address: le.chang19@gmail.com

Attention : Counsel

We the management of Henan Shibang Heavy
Industry Machinery Co.Ltd, China require your legal representation for our
Austria Customers. We are of the opinion that the ability to consolidate
payments from Ausria will eradicate delays due to inter-continental
monetary transaction between Asia and Austria. We understand that a proper
legal Client Retainer will provide the necessary authorization and we are
most inclined to commence talks as soon as possible.Your consideration of
our request is highly anticipated and we look forward to your prompt
response.

request Sincerely,
Lee Chang
Zhongyuan Road and West Fourth Ring Road intersection 200 meters north, Zhengzhou, China.
Postcode：　450042